psssst, hey. there may be spoilers ahead if you haven’t watched all the seasons of Riverdale. continue ahead at your own risk!
I finished the fourth season of Riverdale recently, and boy howdy, do I have opinions.
But before I get into any of that, let’s take a moment to bask in the gloriousness that is Gina Torres. Whether you know her from Firefly, Suits or more recently(ish) WestWorld, Gina Torres takes whatever character is thrown at her and pulls it off magnificently. And with her amazing acting, we get the one episode character Mrs. Burble.
Mrs. Burble is one of possibly three adults who actually care about the mental well-being of the kids in Riverdale. After literal years full of serial killers, bloodthirsty cults, and drug cartels operating under the guise of RPGs, it would be a fracking miracle if any of the teens from Riverdale High (GO BULLDOGS!) didn’t end up mentally a little off-kilter. In this single episode alone, Mrs. Burble points out everything toxic that has gone on in the main characters lives, how almost none of it was on them to fix, and that they are LITERAL CHILDREN who should only be worrying about colleges and football and not having to deal with the town’s collective shitstorm.
A shitstorm that should be cleaned up by an adult over 18.
Yes, this show is pure fiction. I know this but I still can’t get over a bunch of 16 year olds running around at all hours of the day chasing serial killers and fighting in underground boxing matches.
A headcanon of mine is that Riverdale, like Greendale, is full of forces no mortal can comprehend. Much like Night Vale, they are stuck in their own little bubble of weird and know of nothing different than what they’re growing up in. Granted, Veronica has moved from NYC to Riverdale, but since her mother and father are both Bulldogs born and bred, she seemingly shrugs off all the strange happenings as “normal small town stuff” and opens a bar (which, what. the. heck??? When I was 17, I had no business sense and a metric ton of very confusingly outrageous hormones. Also, I was fracking 17 and wouldn’t been allowed legally to open a bar if I tried).
I’d like to see what happens when Archie and the gang get into college out of state and experience what life is like outside of Riverdale. Surely, someone will point out that a) the Gryphons and Gargoyles drama sounds like straight up bad fanfiction, b) all those adults are toxic and abusive, please call child services, and c) how about we get ya’ll some help with all that trauma you’re probably experiencing now?
I’m not going to stop watching this garbage of show because it is so entertaining and out there in terms of several other things on at the moment.
Do you have any headcanons or favorite scenes from Riverdale? Let me know about them in the comments!